Human Design for Parents
As a young single definition Manifestor with three individual channels, my parents took me to get my hearing examined because they were wondering if perhaps that might be the issue. The doctor assured them “her hearing is perfectly fine, she’s just not listening to you”
Some of my favorite work I do lies in the conversations I have with parents who are seeking greater insight into how their children operate, and how to allow them to grow into their truest expression.
This information can be a game changer. For instance, I was an Emotional Manifestor raised by two Splenic Projectors who, for most of my upbringing, subscribed to a very traditional perspective on parenting, ie an abundance of rules and restrictions. As one might imagine, I was not having any of that. By the time I reached High School, our relationship was so disconnected and tumultuous that they were finally open to try something most parents they knew never would have even considered- they surrendered. I’m so lucky. They did not have Human Design, but what they brilliantly realized is exactly the strategy Ra teaches if you want to have a positive relationship with your Manifestor child: Don’t try to control them in any way, unless it’s truly a matter of safety. Show them that if they keep you in the loop (by asking permission when they’re young and informing you when they’re older) that you will not get in the way of their freedom.
Understanding mechanics is crucial, and there are many nuances. It’s so freeing to see the dynamics of your connection laid out with no sense of judgment or blame. It’s not “good” or “bad” that you’re an emotionally defined parent raising an emotionally open child, or that you’re a Manifesting Generator raising a Reflector- it’s just something to know so that you can navigate these differences more harmoniously!
As a parent, even if you have every intention of allowing your children to grow into their most authentic selves, there might still be areas where you end up teaching them what has worked for you, unaware that they operate differently. For instance, a parent with sacral authority (decisions based on in the moment gut responses) might try to encourage a child with emotional authority to be more decisive… when actually it is correct for that child to feel into things! A parent with an open ego who has done a lot of work learning that they have nothing to prove might try to pass on this wisdom to a child with a defined ego, not realizing that competition is actually healthy for their child. If you are a Manifestor who is designed to simply initiate and go after what you want, it might be helpful to understand that it doesn’t work that way for your Projector child, they are designed to be recognized and invited before they can share their gifts.
I love working with parents who are already on board with this sort of parenting philosophy (ie, don’t try to mold your child into anything but rather try your best to step back and allow them to be who they are designed to be, even if it’s totally different from anything you might have imagined)... but naturally, I have a certain soft spot for parents who are terrified of this but have tried everything else. I am happy to meet you where you’re at, and you don’t have to implement anything based on what I say.. but it can’t hurt to at least hear what all the hype is about. A few Human Design sessions could have spared us a lot of heartache, and saved my parents a lot of money on family therapy.