Accepting people as they are

Accepting people as they are is so much easier said than done.

The logic behind this teaching is indisputable. I conceptually understand that people have certain fixed characteristics, ie definition, and it is not only futile, but can also be harmful to myself, the other and the relationship if I try to change (or simply focus my energy on resenting) these characteristics.

But in practice, it is so challenging sometimes!!!

It’s easy when it’s not a particularly close relationship, and I don’t want or need (or *think* I want/need) anything from someone. For instance, my clients. I am great at showering you with permission and approval for all of the things that you might have otherwise been shamed or criticized for. I celebrate your authentic selfishness!!

But what if it’s somebody I’m more intertwined with?

What if it’s a lover who I want more from than he’s able to give me? Can I accept who he is and where he’s at and navigate my own boundaries accordingly, or will I continue to push and pull and try to extract what my mind thinks I want from him?

Or, what if it’s a loved one who doesn’t ‘believe’ in Human Design? For instance, most of my family 🤪 Can I let that be and focus on other elements of our connection, or will I drive us all nuts by persistently trying to convince them?

What if it’s a friend I’m traveling with, and their preferences clash with mine?

What if it is somebody who is going to be relevant in my life for a while whether I like it or not, and I am feeling frustrated by all of the unspoken truths between us, but they have an open emotional center and are unavailable for that conversation?

I have gate 58, the Gate of the Joyous, in my design. It is a love gate that expresses it’s love by sharing its judgments. Because I love you, I am motivated to share with you my honest reflection on how you could experience life with greater health and vitality. The thing about this though, I am continuously asking myself: “is the way that I am motivated to help you improve yourself truly free of personal agenda, and solely focused on serving your highest authentic expression? Or am I trying to change you so that you can better meet my own unmet needs, which may not actually be correct for you to meet?”

“If you allow someone to be who they are and they allow you to be who you are, then that's. Love . Anything else is torture.” ~ Ra Uru Hu

Can you relate? Where do you find it hardest to let people be themselves? Would love to hear in the comments 🥰